Reflections: Indonesia

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This is the second and last part of the two-part “Reflections” series; posts that concludes my holiday.

Last time I went to Indonesia, it was around 2 years ago. I spent a good 3 weeks there. It wasn’t a good holiday at all. I just graduated from Masters Degree and all I felt during my holiday was pressure. The pressure came from my parents and first-degree family who pushed me to get a job ASAP which they expressed to me in a passive-aggressive way. I stick to my principles and went back to the Netherlands even though they would like me to find a job in Indonesia. A decision worth remembering, for it shaped what I am right now.

Fast forward to two years later (now), I came back to Indonesia with confidence, but also with a little insecurity. Will they like me the way I am? I know I have changed a lot, even more than my last visit two years ago. Are they going to comment on my life choices? (“they” refers to my close family and close friends, the ones I met during my holiday)

The answers: yes and no. My family considered me as a guest and they didn’t force me to do house chores or to wake up early, which was a total difference from my first visit two years ago. My grandparents didn’t even force me to go to church for Easter service. During this visit, they really let me do whatever I wanted to, and I felt really good about it because my holiday wasn’t just about my family but also about my best friends.

I also felt my family has respected my life choices, however, sometimes they made comments that made me uncomfortable, such as criticising my weight (yes, I gain weight, deal with it) and “hoping” that I would contribute to the family. By monthly monetary support, I guess. Unfortunately I can’t do this one right now because I’m also still building a life and still struggling with my dreams and plans. Thank goodness, my father wasn’t the one who criticised me, he even gave me a lot of new insights on what I should and should not do.

About living in Indonesia, hmm… I was really not used to the whole traffic jam. Living in the Netherlands, I am so used to having multiple appointments at the same day and attending them on time. In Jakarta, you can’t do that; you have to spare a couple of hours to battle with traffic jam to get from one point to another. I really salute Jakartans for they have an abundant tolerance against traffic jam.

Jakarta two years ago is so different than Jakarta now. Currently, massive development is happening in vital parts of town. The government is building MRT lines, including in my neighbourhood. This wasn’t a familiar sight two years ago. They are also busy to beautify the town, since they will be the host of Asian Games this year.

I don’t know when I’m coming back for another round of holiday. To tell you the truth, I’m not fond of coming back every year because I am not the homesick type of person and I’m not much of a family person too. I’d rather save my money to go travel someplace else, and probably visit my home country once every two or three years.

More to explore

Nguping dan Nyinyir di Pemilu

Tiga observasi kelakuan orang Indonesia yang ditemukan saat Pemilu serentak 2019 di Den Haag. Yuk nyinyir bareng!

6 thoughts on “Reflections: Indonesia

  1. Senang bacanya klo keluargamu sudah melihat kamu menjadi orang yg mandiri dengan pilihan hidupmu. Dan mereka menerima itu. Aku juga selalu salut dengan orang2 yg kerja di Jkt. Salut bagaimana mereka menghabiskan banyak waktu di jalan. Meskipun pernah di situasi itu, nyaris 7 tahun cukuplah waktu buatku untuk mengais rejeki dan belajar ttg hidup di Jkt.
    Yg bikin aku grogi kalo nanti liburan ke Indonesia, gagap dengan banyaknya perubahan. 4 tahun ga pulang pasti buanyaaakk banget yg merubah. Nah, bisa ga aku tune in nanti di sana. Aku memilih ga setiap tahun pulang karena perjalanan menuju kampung halaman tuh lama dan panjang. 15 jam ke Jkt + 1.5jam an ke Sby + 6 jam ke kota ku. Kebayang capenya kan. Meskipun sekarang sudah ada Garuda sih klo mau ke Jember. Tapi pulang 3-4 tahun sekali cukuplah. Sambil menabung rindu *tsahh! 😅

  2. Monthly monetary support itu bakal dirasain orang2 Indonesia seumuran kita kok Tal krn kita (dianggap) udah kerja, udah bisa giving back from what we have received before including facilities. Start from paying utilities sampe “kapan ajak mama liburan? Si X udah ajak mama nya jalan2 ke Singapore lho #eaaa” 😂

    Kalo kita rela2 aja sih gpp, emang kita yg ikhlas bantu. Tp kalo sampe diminta2 in a passive aggressive way? Hmm..

    1. Gw sih kalo deket ya rela lah Ge, tapi biaya hidup di NL ga murah juga udah gitu gw ada rencana2 lain kan. Jadi gw cuekin aja yang ngomong gitu. Toh cuma sambil lalu, gak di seriusin ngomongnya.

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